My Recovery Notes are entries from a handwritten journal I kept for 30 days – from the time when I first thought something was wrong with my leg to the end of my first month out of the hospital. My notes start with the day I went for a short run, and I thought I injured my knee again. They end with the last day of my first month out of the hospital. You will notice there are no writings on days 6-15. This is the time I spent in the hospital, and my thoughts from that time are mostly non-existent. I don’t remember much of anything from the days spent in the intensive care unit, and only small things from the rest of my time in the hospital. My doctors believe the memory loss is a combination of severe trauma, repressed memories, and also being on pain medications for the duration of my time there. Maybe someday, I will try to write about that time. It’s still difficult for me to think about, but I also know the power of writing to heal.
Talking about what happened to me helped me to deal with the trauma I experienced in more ways than one. From the scattered thoughts and illegible writing on white pages to the clean, crisp design of this blog site, I took my words from paper to screen when I began writing my blog. I began writing about my experiences, with the hope that it could one day help someone else through a difficult recovery from blood clots, that was often isolating and overwhelming.
I have talked a lot about journaling, and how helpful it was for me. To this day, it remains a central part of the work I do here. I always share a journal prompt with you, at the end of each blog post, to encourage you to write down how you feel. It’s different than thinking about it, because by writing things down, you get them out of your head (literally or symbolically) and put them somewhere else. My journaling and writing has helped me to heal in more ways than one. I am able to get my worst thoughts about what happened to me out of my head, and onto a piece of paper or computer screen, so they can stop floating around.
I also hope that my writing helps other people who are struggling with the things that I once did. Helping people helps me heal too. I hope that by reading these notes you feel less alone, and understand just how life-changing and scary recovery from blood clots can be. I also hope that you read them and realize that there is hope for recovery from blood clots. There is hope for better days ahead, and a return to the things you love. Don’t give up. You are not fighting alone, and for the vast majority of people, it goes get better.
The First 30 Days of Blood Clot Recovery
Here are my personal entries from a handwritten journal I kept right after my DVT and PE.
There is hope for healing and you are not alone,
Reader Writes In: Journal your thoughts, or share in the comments below. What were the most significant challenges during your first month of blood clot recovery?
Read More: Resources for people who have been recently diagnosed with blood clots.
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It was a horroring experience amplified more so because my mum pass away three years ago from a clot going to her lungs. I didn’t know what to do that was safe. Everytime I felt pain in the legs or elsewhere I break out in sweat cause I was wondering if the clot had moved. Even now I am still at home recuping from a near fatal hemorrhaging as a result of side effects from medication. I feel tired all the time;frustrated with my ability to do all I want to do without fear. I cry sometimes. I was just diagnosed 3 weeks ago with dvt and since then has to be hospitalized for hemorrhaging. I am scared!!!!
Its my third week. I feel so blessed because my clot was small and I am surrounded by family/friends/church/workplace. It was so humbling to read your experience. It is also so helpful as I pushed it too far today and sit here at 1.30am crying in pain because I thought I was healed but am not. And the anxiety!!! My gosh!!! I can’t put it all into words. THANK YOU.
Thank you for sharing this. How I wish I had done this. Here I am approaching my first even almost 9 years ago abs in some ways feel like yesterday. I’m struggling to breathe still and still have this pain that has never subsided from my left lung. I wish I had journaled. I need to start now just not sure where to start. Once again my friend you have brought such healing and life to so many and to me will never forget finding you when I was at my lowest point ever.
Thank you, This is my second time with PE in both lungs, i needed to hear this.