Living with Antiphospholipid Syndrome

In 2012, I experienced pain in behind my left knee that felt like someone put my skin and muscles in a vice-grip. I thought it was the recurrence of a running injury, and I decided to rest for the weekend. I soon experienced pain in my side that made it hard to breathe and impossible to lay down flat to sleep. It felt like the air was slowly but surely sucked from my lungs as more time passed. At the insistence of my primary care physician, I went to the emergency room, where I was diagnosed with a blood clot in my leg (deep vein thrombosis or DVT) and a life-threatening blood clot in my lung (pulmonary embolism or PE). I was admitted to the intensive care unit, where I stayed for several days as doctors worked to stabilize my situation and waited to see what would happen. When I eventually went home, I faced an extended recovery period that was unlike anything I ever expected.

In a lot of ways, blood clots were just the beginning for me. Shortly after I was diagnosed with DVT and PE, I was also diagnosed with antiphospholipid syndrome or APS. It is an autoimmune condition in which your blood clots abnormally because your body mistakenly produces antibodies that attack phospholipids, a type of fat that plays a key role in clotting. APS – and to a lesser extent hormonal birth control – was to blame for my blood clots.

It was early June, and since June is APS Awareness Month, my internet searches revealed quite a lot of information about this disease, although it still seems like there is still more to learn. APS affects women much more than it does men, and not a lot is known about how a person acquires it. It is believed to be triggered by an environmental factor, such as an infection in an individual with a genetic makeup that makes him or her more susceptible to the disease, or from an autoimmune condition, like lupus or Sjogren’s syndrome.

Doctors don’t know why I have APS, or why it triggered such extensive clotting in my body. Some people with APS do not develop blood clots at all, however, antiphospholipid antibodies are present in 15 – 20% of all cases of DVT, and in one-third of new strokes occurring in people under 50 years old (Source). In women, antiphospholipid antibodies can be a major cause of recurrent miscarriages and pregnancy complications. APS can also lead to numerological symptoms like chronic headaches and migraines, heart disease, and bleeding as a result of low platelets, which is another problem that I have encountered. In very rare cases, excessive clotting can lead to widespread organ failure and what is known as catastrophic APS, or CAPS. There is no cure for APS to date, and even though the antibodies can go into remission, the disease never goes away.

I don’t often think of myself as living with a chronic, or long-term disease, but in reality, that is what I am doing. I am fortunate that APS has not caused any additional problems for me, but there are ongoing concerns about my blood’s increased tendency to clot. As a result, my treatment involves taking anticoagulants, or blood thinners, for the foreseeable future, along with some other supplements to maintain the health of my blood, including folic acid, vitamin k, and iron. I also take aspirin, an antiplatelet, to help prevent stroke. I take the blood thinner warfarin, which is the only suitable treatment for me at this time, so I have to get my blood’s PT/INR monitored regularly through vein draws at my doctor’s office to make sure my medication is working properly. Depending on how I am doing, I could have my PT/INR monitored weekly, or every few weeks, it just varies. One thing is for certain though, with warfarin, I can never stop monitoring my blood to ensure its effectiveness and my safety.

Antiphospholipid syndrome, and blood clots, have changed my life in a lot of ways. I go to more doctor’s appointments and manage my treatment to the best of my ability, which can be time-consuming. Managing APS is often the same as managing my future risk for blood clots. I need to take my medication as prescribed and stay in communication with my healthcare team about any changes in my body, or any new concerns I have. I need to talk to my doctors and take precautions if I have surgery or am hospitalized, plan a pregnancy, or become pregnant. I need to remain vigilant for signs and symptoms of blood clots, stroke, and heart disease, and try to make or maintain the lifestyle changes that promote health and happiness, such as eating well, hydrating well, exercising on a regular basis, and making time to de-stress and relax.

Living with APS can also be challenging emotionally, and there are times when I struggle with that more than the physical care I undergo. I sometimes worry about the long-term repercussions of having this disease and wonder what, if anything, might happen next. Will I wake up one day and have a stroke? Will my heart fail me? Will APS lead to another complication that is not so manageable? I wonder why I got APS in the first place, and I wonder if I could have done something to prevent it before it led to life-threatening blood clots. It can be hard to overcome these thoughts, and they can bring me down, especially when I am overwhelmed and facing stressful situations, or when I have concerns about something my body might be trying to tell me.

I manage my feelings about living with APS in two ways. One, I have an excellent medical team, including a hematologist, who manages my ongoing care. I get blood work done about every three months to monitor for additional problems, or concerns. I see my doctors regularly for follow-up appointments, and I do not hesitate to call if I have a problem between those appointments.

Second, I try to be positive about what I have been through, and where I am going. APS is different for everyone, just like blood clots, and my experience will not be the same as the next person’s experience. If DVT and PE are the worst complications I experience as a result of antiphospholipid syndrome, I know that I have already survived the worst. I continue to hope that perhaps the worst really has come and gone, and each year that I do not have another complication, my hope continues to grow.

The most important thing for me to remember is that although I have an illness that will never go away, I can still live a happy, healthy life. If you have been diagnosed with APS, you need to understand this too. APS is serious, and it is scary. An APS diagnosis can feel like the end of your life, and yes, it can lead to some serious consequences. There is no cure now, however, APS is manageable and treatable in most instances. Make sure you have a specialized medical team, or doctor, and make sure you learn as much as you can about antiphospholipid syndrome. Take care of yourself to the best of your ability, and if you’re struggling to process your diagnosis or treatment, talk to a professional who can provide you with strategies and coping tools for managing chronic illness.

Where to Go for More Information

There is hope for healing, and you are not alone.



Reader Writes In: Do you have antiphospholipid syndrome or another clotting condition? Share your story in the comments below.

Read more about antiphospholipid syndrome on my blog.

You are not alone. Connect with the private BCRN Facebook community for more inspiration and encouragement.


  1. Hi,
    Thank you for writing about your experience. I am a 23 year old female. At 22 I had a stroke, TIA specifically, which didn’t leave any lasting damage fortunately. I found out that I have a patent foramen ovale and antiphospholipid syndrome. I underwent open heart surgery to get my PFO repaired and reduce my risk stroke in the future. Now I am just coming to terms with the fact that I have this autoimmune disease that requires me to make changes to my lifestyle. I’m terrified of starting warfarin because I’m just 23 and I like to occasionally drink with friends and I’m not enthusiastic about getting regular INR testing. Additionally, I know once I start any kind of anticoagulant therapy I know I will have to remain on it and be vigilant about it for the rest of my life, as going off of it could trigger an embolic event. One of the things that I am most devastated about is the idea that I might not be able to have kids or experience a normal, healthy pregnancy. I don’t want to have kids just yet but I always thought they would be in my future and now I wonder if it will even be possible. I’m writing to you because I’m in desperate need of support from someone else who has the same thing. Thank you for reading my lengthy message.

  2. Dear Brianne,

    I too was diagnosed with antiphospholipid syndrome after going to the emergency room with a TIA. I now have what is called a “leaky valve” and will need surgery.
    You are not alone. Because I found out I had APS before getting pregnant my high risk doctor was able to monitor me and my baby. I was put on a different blood thinner during pregnancy. Besides the extra visits to the Dr. it was fine. Please don’t be devastated. She is healthy and beautiful and almost 10! Most women find out they have APS after they have a miscarriage so even though I have this I felt fortunate to know beforehand.

  3. Hallo

    My name is Chamotei, I have been diagnosed with APS early in February 2017 when I found out I had a DVT in my left calve, I then also got the surprise announcement that I was 11 weeks pregnant.

    During pregnancy I was on Clexane 80 + 40 mg two times per day and after birth I am now on Warfarin. This event changed my life and hangs like a sword over my head on a daily basis.

    When reading your statement I felt a relieve as I felt I was fighting this battle alone and the daily stressing about how long will I live without an event that might take my life and prevent my 3 children from growing up with a mother. While reading your story it felt as if I was reading my own words, this gives me hope to keep on going.


  4. Hi. I was just recently diagnosed with APS after having a TIA. My problem is that i stopped my visanne pills for my endometriosis and now the pain is back with a vengeance. I wonder what treatment did you have for your endometriosis? I am currently depressed and scared.

    • Marsha Funk says

      I have recently been diagnosed with APS and Polymyositis! I have no idea what this combination means and am concerned about my future and what the prognosis is with these two rare diseases combined. I am at a greater risk of cancer! I just don’t understand enough about the two rare diseases and what my future holds!

  5. Where did this APS come from? It is such a challenge to deal with mentally and emotionally. I am 51 and was caring for my terminally ill mother who had cancer and was bed ridden. Two weeks into care, I had a stroke which rendered my left leg immobile. I was put on life flight to the Houston medical center where emergency surgery was done to remove the clot. And this is where I learned of APS and a PFO in my heart. I am currently on Lovenox and will be transitioning to Warfarin. I am interviewing doctors at this time for possible PFO closure, although my hematologist advises against it. I am so grateful I can walk, and there are no long term effects from this episode. But, it is still truly devastating. The ‘what ifs’ dance through my mind. Some days I am so overwhelmed I can’t breath. What will happen long term on blood thinners, or with the APS? I am not sure what the future holds.

    • SureshEswar says

      I am 33,M,India. I was diagnosed with DVT followed by PE on 2019. Confirmed as APS with 2 tests in 6 months time gap. Since then I am taking warfarin daily, taking PT INR test every fortnight, taking LFT, CBC tests every 3months. After 2019, I had Pneumonia twice so far and admitted in hospital. I suggest APS people to get PneumoVac shot to prevent pneumonia. Good to know that I am not battling this alone.

  6. I was diagnosed with APS after I had a massive stroke in December 2019. I was only 35 at the time. I was lucky tbat after spending 6 days in the hospital, 4 of which were un ICU, I left with only a new stutter and memory issues. I have managed to get my stutter under control, but still have memory problems. I take blood thinners now and will for the rest of my life. I struggle many days because my life had changed forever. I’m no longer allowed to do the things I lived to do before. I can’t play any contact sports due to the possibility of head injury. There’s been ups and downs since I had the stroke due to APS. Maybe one day there will be more answers as to why we got this and if it will ever be “cure.”

  7. Elize Rudolph says

    Hi I am Elize , had a stroke at the age of 36 years , loss my hearing .In 2018 had DVT and PE , clot in liver and another stroke in June 2022 . I was on Xarelto 20 mg till April 2022 .Was diagnosed with APS in June 2022 , my bloodthinners was changed to Pradaxa 150 mg .
    I am terrified since so little information is available on APS.

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